Handling Love . . . Handles

Alright, so there is a guy I often see at the gym (one where I workout, not the one where I work) and he is constantly grabbing his lower back. He's not grabbing in a way that suggests "oh wow, my lower back really hurts," instead, he's grabbing in a way that suggests he hates his body. He winces and frowns and runs with his hands on his lower back as if he's trying to hide them from everybody in the gym.

For some reason this really bothers me.

I see this kid at the gym almost every single night and I each time I see him looking at himself in the mirror grabbing at his "love handles." He seems frustrated and obsessed with it. Here is what I can ascertain from a distance:

• he wants to lose body fat
• he works out at least five times a week
• he does at least 30 minutes of cardio on 3 of those days
• he incorporates resistance training
• he's gay (it's relevant because it likely causes unrealistic expectations about his body)

So from my limited data, he's doing a good job at his own battle - he is highly motivated and has a goal in mind, things trainers love to see in their own clients. However, he could switch up a couple of things in order to get better and faster results:

First, we must admit that there are some things about our bodies that we can't change. We're given a frame and there is nothing you can do at the gym to change it. You can however, make the most of what you're given. Obsessing about it actually makes it nearly impossible to change it. Even when this kid has zero fat, he is still going to think and believe he has those pesky love handles, which consequently on him are not that bad at all.

Second, cardio is key to losing fat but more effective when accompanied with some resistance training on different days. The weekly general rule for working up a sweat is 3 days to feel good, 5 days to look good. However, cardio doesn't just mean jumping on the treadmill or elliptical for 30 minutes. To fight some wicked fat and to kick your cardio ass try doing radical intervals that alternate between 70 and 85% of your maximum heart rate (If you want help figuring this out, let me know). I suggest 2 minutes at the low end followed by 1 minute at the high end. Same rule applies if you're on the rower (which I prefer over the others), or the ultimate cardio experience -- the VersaClimber.

Third, this kid does "work out" with weights. That's good because we all know that the more muscle you have - the more calories you burn during rest. But since he clearly wants to lose some extra weight he should be engaged in a nice little circuit jumping from set to set with no rest. So instead of spending 20 minutes doing a few sets of dramatic bench presses and dumbbell flys he would be better served going from a press to a row to a fly to a reverse fly to a pull down to a shoulder press several times at a medium weight followed by a similar circuit for the lower body and abs. After a few weeks of doing this three times a week - he'll be happy.

So I see this kid pretty much every night but have never talked to him. I feel funny just going up to people at the gym. No matter how sly it would seem like a pick up and that's not my intent. Last night he was there with two other guys (which really slowed down his already slow workout). One guy left and gave him a kiss before doing so . . . only in New York will you see two guys kissing on the floor of a gym. Ok, ok so this gym is in the Village so I guess it's safe to say it's to be expected.